Being good at amicable breakups is an incredibly valuable skill, especially when you’re just sexually incompatible.
Only secondary to being a great partner. It has allowed me to maintain deep and enriching friendships with my past partners. The key to leaving a relationship and maintaining the love, friendship and compassion that is so important is: (drum roll) not needing a laundry list of reasons to leave. Sometimes it’s only a few things. Often times it’s only one.
The most common reason I wish people would embrace, is unfortunately, hard to explain. Which is why people often ignore it and bull through mediocre relationships. It usually sounds something like this:
“I love to dance to pop music in my kitchen while I make dinner, but my SO thinks I’m nuts.”
“I wanted to try a threesome, but my girlfriend isn’t down and says it’s too logistically complicated.”
“I wish I could explore BDSM-ey stuff, but when I bring it up, my partner jokes that I must have daddy issues.”
“I’ve always loved decorating for xmas and listening to cheesy holiday music, but I can tell it annoys my girlfriend.” “The only way I can orgasm is through oral sex, but my boyfriend get bored.”
And I tell them all the same thing.… Read the rest