The problem with social commentary on sexuality is that we often try to use logic to draw lines between our experiences in the bedroom and our experiences in our day-today lives.
We build expectations around a person based on the way they order coffee, how they act at work and what movies they Netflix. But there is rarely a logical connection between everyday personality and sexual charisma.
We think that alpha men are obviously more dominant and powerful in the bedroom and nice guys who are soft spoken and more thoughtful must be romantic and boring in the bedroom. We see this constantly perpetuated by TV and movie characters.
But it is not our personalities that rule in the bedroom. When sexually intelligent people find themselves in a relationship where they can let their erotic nature and subconscious rise to the surface – the id finds itself coming up for air and for a much needed recalibration.… Read the rest